Some of us out in the field of daygame have noticed that girls are coming back out to the streets. Some of us are even getting numbers. So it seems we’re out of the woods and in the clear. Yet many have also experienced high flake rates, as astutely noted by RP McMurphy over at RedPillDad. It appears to be a global trend as the London Lads (i.e. everyone not in the US) have been tweeting out similar results.
This puts me in a bit of an awkward place. Those who are following my blog know that I’m working through my Player’s Journey123, and quite early on in the process. I would say that I’m sitting comfortably in the Belly of the Whale, tumbling down the Road of Trials. I’m about 550 approaches and 1 year in. I continue to make progress over my social skills (practiced during meetings at work), fitness (lifting and diet) and logistics. Additionally, I’m re-thinking my fashion. I felt for a long time that my daygame attire should match my work attire, otherwise I’m representing a fraudulent version of myself. I’ve since come to accept that perhaps it’s the Breeze at work that needs to put on a mask, not the one on the streets. Work requires a certain degree of diplomacy and social etiquette; on the streets we get a chance to be our real selves. Thomas Crown describes a similar, though much quicker, transition to his Daygame outfit in his memoir Demolition Lovers.
If I had an SMV ruler, I would say my SMV jumped 0.64-0.89 points since I started approaching a year ago. It’s been a month since volume began to return to my little village of a city, yet my results aren’t so different than from before. Perhaps then, it’s my Game.
Possibly. Probably. Now I’m no Gilbert Stone or Viper BangUp4, but I think I’ve got the basics down. I would rate my Game as a late-stage beginner. There’s no question it’s much improved. The evidence is in the frame I hold in my texting and the comfort I feel in my sets. I no longer script out my opening words and my stack before an approach; I no longer look up an internal dictionary of lines from the Daygame elite. I’m not following the LDM in linear fashion. I don’t force the interaction, I guide it.
The training wheels are coming off. And with it, so is the pressure.
Despite the improvements, the lack of results are keeping me from hitting the Joy of Daygame. And it didn’t help any when I finally took up The Red Quest’s suggestion to read Dateonomics.
The basic premise of the book is that when there exists a gender imbalance in a population, the sex in lower supply has an upper hand in dating options. When men are scarce, there’s a lot more fuckin’ and less snugglin’. This is a seller’s market5. The seller will sell to any buyer who can afford the cost of his product (i.e. is her SMV above his threshold). And when men control the market, they’re going to fuck around and spread their seed. On the other hand, when women are in short supply it becomes a buyer’s market. They’re more selective and pick out only the highest SMV product they can lock down.
He opens the book by discussing college campuses, where women outnumber men in most schools by 20-50%. One 19 year old girl he interviewed said that half the guys at her college are undateable and a third are in relationships, so that leaves 20% of the men to feast from an open buffet of women. The girls at her campus accept that and casually fuck around with the relatively few available men–albeit, begrudgingly so. This is consistent with what we know about SMV matching6 in the SMP.
He then moves on to NYC. This bit stung when I first read it. In Manhattan, men are in under supply and are depicted as massive players. He relayed story after story about nerdy guys who didn’t pull until they moved to Manhattan. Here I’m thinking that I put in all this work to improve my SMV, yet am still struggling to pull girls while many of these blue-pill geeks7 are killing it with no understanding of Game and male/female polarity. WTF!? It was disheartening. There are stories of guys rolling into a wine bar solo, having their pick of the lot with the women inside, then going back to his for a tantalizing tryst in which the girl expects nothing more than casual sex despite craving a steady relationship with men.
So what is Nerdy Ned doing in the Upper East Side that I’m not?
For NYers, a couple of things probably popped out at you in the preceding statements. The words wine bar and Upper East Side are not where player’s hunt for their meals. Because the girls there are old. Like 30-40-years-of-disappointment-experience old.
I don’t doubt the premise of the book, or the findings. But the man does not understand SMV matching. Girls go after high-value men. That is, both girls that are of low- and high-value are going to match up, because eggs are expensive and sperm is cheap8. The author of Dateonomics assumes that men and women are interchangeable, that they’re commodities like the stock widget referred to when explaining supply-demand curves.
But men, and women, are capable of differentiating themselves. Not all smartphones are equal, nor are a person’s SMV.
Red Pill Dad and Red Coco wrote about the deregulation of the SMP where women are not settling for an SMV match and are all aiming for Top Guys. In short, girls in their 20’s are looking for Chads, then become disappointed when they can’t lock them down. Some girls hit the wall and shift their strategy: they realize finding a Dad packaged up as a Chad is nearly impossible, so they shed the desire for alpha and accept beta as a solid, reliable, supportive provider. The previously mentioned players, however, have noticed that post-wall girls are less commonly making this realization. They still want the Chad Dad.
See the problem?
I believe NYC is a great market for pulling, though I haven’t unlocked the pleasures of this city yet. If it weren’t for Runner and Roy Walker expressing similar difficulty with applying Daygame to NYC, I would be experiencing a bit of a crisis with my lack of results, especially after reading Datonomics. In Roy Walker’s review, he stipulates as to why NYC isn’t as receptive to Daygame, noting that most girls we approach are American and likely to date within their social circle, and that picking up girls in bars is more socially acceptable.
Whatever the cause, I don’t intend to stop my street approach sessions though I may take my foot off the gas and reduce my work rate.
Though I got into Daygame to improve my dating life, it has helped me with everything but. My social skills are sharper, I dress better, I’m in better physical shape, my personal/professional relationships have improved and I’ve got made more high-value friends. Perhaps the most efficient method of pulling in NYC is improving my online game (better pictures, to start with), running Game in bars, or networking.
I may try bar game a bit, though I have a couple of other ideas as well. With less time on the streets, I’m thinking to finally get back into jiu jitsu. I’ve got 6 months of training under my white belt and loved every second of grappling like my life depended on it. Given my list of books is now in the triple digits, I may spend more time reading. The next two on my list are Emotions Revealed and Balls Deep. I’d also like to jaunt around Europe a bit to see how things are there. If women truly are more receptive to Daygame and my looks across the pond, we may see a Breeze cross over the Atlantic with intent.
If that happens, best believe the American Daygame Model is coming along with me.
- Krauser’s twist on the Hero’s Journey.
- I equally prefer Dan Harmon’s Circle Theory of Story.
- Six seasons and a movie!
- Dude is the only guy who’s shown unequivocal evidence of 90% success rate!
- Since men have the duty of approaching, they are the seller.
- Or up-matching for girls.
- No hate, I’m a nerdy geek myself.
- If you’re interested in the subject, checkout the books under Evolutionary Biology in my Resources page.
- Horse not included.